Do you know that it will cost a lot of money to disown a kin - newspaper advertisement, lawyer's fee..... Just joking.
Daddy loves you

(: I LOVE MY DADDY!

BEST LAHHHS!
i actually dropped a module without second thoughts
& now, i realise i should never drop a module cos I need 5 modules per semester

tell me
i smart or not?!
i'm SOOOO smart that I can't stand myself!
i think i'm the joker of the year ):

i like naked lips xD
but i think i should get a tan, then the lips willl be even more power!
i hate it when ppl say i look too white, fk it man
with or without make up i am still this colour ok?
must be jealous of my fair complexion hahahas
just that w makeup, it is minus the blemishes thus the illusion of putting too much powder?
i don't even put on any foundation lahs, so tell me how to be having too much powder on?!
one weekend where baby & friends went to topone ktv. we look like we were playing arcade games whenever we are selecting songs to sing! cool or not? LOLS

shaker friesssss! superduper addictive siiaalll!

OK
blogger is killing me!
i have tonnes of pictures to upload & i can't!!!!

anyway,
today i woke up thinking about how perfect my life is
you know people tend to complain about how imperfect their life is and feel all so upset about it?
i have been feeling that way for the past few months

i thought about the wonderful people i have in my life
best of all, my dearest daddy
i don't even dare to think about my life without my daddy
he is the pillar of support in my life
always there for me
and somehow, i thought about how much he has given me
and i on the other hand, brought him nothing but trouble
i think the only thing that makes my daddy proud of me is my studies?
though it isn't very good, but at least i did not give up at all
I have never been an independent girl, daddy has always been with me and never leaving me to settle things on my own.
i have to say, i am still a daddy's girl (:

thought about my stable relationship with baby
moving in has been working well on our r/s
we hardly quarrel, in the past we'd argue about silly stuffs
our life is rather mundane now
i guess it's better than having problems every other days
Oh, i have been cooking lately
and I must say i am realllyyy proud of myself!
when baby asked me to cook dinner for him
i'd get excited or in fact, nervous about cooking that i'd lose sleep the night before
i know i'm crazy
but i'm glad my first trials at cooking have been successful & baby loves my food (:
& cos i have been cooking, i get my daily dose of vegetables!
i told leeling that i'd die if i do not consume any vegetables in a day ahahs.
last saturday, i caught UP with baby & friends
it was ultraaaa cute and reallyyyy touching! i hope baby and i could lead a simple life like the old man & his wife.
i cried when his wife attached pictures of their everyday life as an adventure with her husband. they are such wonderful couple! it was a slow movie, but i love love love it!

(ok back to the entry)

then i thought about my friends
i am not a very sociable person, neither do i open up to others easily
so, i am happy enough that i have some good friends from every stage in my life
ariana from primary school
gladys, jamie, samantha from nan chiiiauuu
leeling & meiqi from poly

i felt so blessed after having these thoughts
even though i am at the lowest point in my life, i am still or rather very very very glad to have all these important and wonderful people in my life (:
i am thankful, i really am!

Gladys emailed me upon reading my previous post.
I must say that I was really shocked and at the same time, touched.
It is true when people say that friends who stick by you through hard times are the most precious friends in life.
She shared some advices and experiences with me
as well as making me see things in a clearer view.
It has been a long time since someone touched my heart.
Thank you for being such a darling (:

Bestie also sms me the other day,
telling me that she'll always be around when I need someone.
Isn't she sweet?

Somehow, such actions from these wonderful friends really warmed my heart.
I realised that it doesn't matter if we see each other every day or frequently,
what matters most is that we keep a lookout for one another.

i tried to reassure people that i am doing fine
just so they won't worry about me
but inside, i'm terribly stressed out
emotionally stressed out by my relatives & many personal matters

i know they care for me and they are trying to help
the thing is i don't need any help
my parents are wonderful, especially my daddy
i am OK now, i won't say i'm happy
i am just plain OK.
just leave me alone!

and to add to the stress,
you just think i do not have the initiative
never mind, i'll just be whatever you say
cos seriously, i am really facing lots of problems since i moved out
problems you'll never have to face
you may say i deserve it, but wait till you are in my shoes
still, i want to thank you for always keeping me informed
i have yet to put everything into place, give me time
all i need is time to settle all the problems in my life

i just wished you could be the friend who will stand by me to support me, instead of putting me down & saying things like i don't care about anything at all.
the fact is, i have lots of things to take care of. and it hurts alot when you say such things to a friend who is going through a difficult time.
i guess you just really didnt understand me.
i am not always ok when i say i am.i just don't know how to relate my problems to anyone
things that i often complain about aren't problems actually, it's the things that i keep in my heart that are bothering me.

i know i am just an irresponsible friend to you, nevermind i'll just take the label.
just continue to judge me, i'm just nothing but irresponsible and someone with no initiative.